Thirteen

Today my son, my eldest child, my first born, my biggest boy turns 13. THIRTEEN. A teenager.

How did that happen? How did he grow up? How did he get so big? How am I the mum of a teenager?

In many ways, 13 hasn’t come as a shock. That’s what being one of the youngest kids in the year at school does – all his friends are 13 already, so there’s a part of me that has felt he’s been a teenager for a while.

What to write about this milestone? Do I reflect on how far he’s come or exactly where he is now, or write about a bit of both?

He came into the world in the early hours of Wednesday 27th June, after a labour which had started two days earlier. He was a tiny little thing, lying on the floor surrounded by blood (I gave birth standing up). As a baby, he was hard work. He was colicky and cried a lot, he didn’t have much of a routine and everything was a challenge. But he grew into a delightful toddler. He was so happy, with the biggest blue eyes and a lovely smile.

And he just kept on growing – older, bigger, more opinionated, cleverer…

And now he’s 13.

PicMonkey eldestCollage

My son right now is a typical 13 year old boy. Everything I read about 12 and 13 year olds could be written about him. It’s reassuring to know that, when he’s challenging us, it’s just his age talking and he will eventually grow out of it.

He’s nearly as tall as me – he’s overtaken his Grandma – and I have no doubt he will have left me way behind by this time next year. His feet are bigger than mine now (and mine aren’t small!). He’s always looked the same size as his brother (they have been mistaken for twins many times over the years), but now the gap between them is growing. My boys is starting his growth spurt.

He doesn’t have the best attitude to school and school work, although the reports he get from school are pretty good. His behaviour at school is impeccable, his work not quite as good. I feel he’s not fulfilling his own potential and that his secondary school don’t know what his potential is, so they’re happy to let him coast and do quite well, but not really well. He hardly ever does homework and the homework he does is largely illegible (he’s left-handed and has always struggled with his handwriting). The other day he gave me a letter dated March telling me when his year 8 exams were. Needless to say, the exams were over. He’d never thought fit to tell me he was doing them.

He still plays violin and passed his Grade 2 earlier this year, but he doesn’t play as much as he used to. He has a slightly defeatist attitude to it and won’t be brave and try to play a tune he hasn’t been taught in his lesson.

He loves fishing, but I suspect his interest in that is starting to wane a bit after a year of obsession. He doesn’t talk about it as much and hasn’t been fishing for a while now. He has had many obsessions over the years (mainly for collecting things), but he usually gets bored of them after a year or two.

He got his rugby-playing mojo back over the last year, which I’m really pleased about. As he’s quite small for his age he was starting to look tiny and vulnerable on the rugby pitch. He had a bit of a wobble at the start of the year and was considering quitting, but we don’t encourage quitting in our house. He stuck at it and started playing for the school team too. I was so proud that he got the most improved player trophy for the under 13s this year.

His biggest love is still Scouts. He loves camping, he loves hiking, he loves everything about it. I am so pleased he has found something which really fulfils him and hope he makes the most of his last year before he moves up to Explorers.

My boy is developing some strong and pretty well-informed opinions. He is interested in the world around him and the news on TV. Sometimes I think he’s better informed than me. He has a clear sense of right and wrong, which I’m proud of (although his brother and sister are exempt from this and being horrible to them is perfectly OK). Just the other day he reported some kids for bullying a boy on the bus. The boy is older than him, but has a slight learning disability which makes him more vulnerable. In reporting the bullies my son potentially put himself at risk, so I’m proud of him for doing this.

A while ago I thought my son’s relationship with his brother was wavering slightly, but their shared love of Xbox and Minecraft has brought them back together. They’ve always been the best of friends and I’m pleased they are again, although I’d much rather they were doing something different.

His relationship with his sister continues to be strained. He cannot stop himself from having a go at her and arguing with her. It is pretty much constant from the second they get up. I don’t know why he dislikes her so much, but he does.

As teenagers go, he’s a pretty good one and I have no doubt he will grow into an adult I will be proud to call my son.

Happy birthday, my big boy.

Son, birthday, Teenager, 13

Author: Sarah Mummy

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23 Comments

  1. A big Happy Birthday to him. He sounds fantastic and such a brilliant thing to do to reporting the bullies. Not ever teen is brave enough to do that. You have a very good boy there I think :).

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    • Thanks very much, I do! He has his moments, but his heart is in the right place! To be honest, I was a bit scared for him when he told me he’d reported bullies!

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  2. Oh my, 13!!!! That’s such a big deal, so amazing!! My little guy turned 1 yesterday that’s flown by but I can imagine he will be 13 in what will feel like a blink of an eye!! #PoCoLo

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    • It does go pretty fast! Happy birthday to your little man too.

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  3. Happy birthday to him and well done on becoming the mother of a Teen. I do think once they settle into then it’s much easier., but he sounds like a fantastic lad anyway.

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    • That’s reassuring to know, thanks! He is a good boy (although he has his moments with his brother and sister, as they all do!).

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  4. He sounds like my teen, he was always conscientious and thoughtful to others. I hope you’re lucky and that the change that is coming, isn’t too drastic! Lol

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    • Thanks very much, I’m keeping my fingers crossed! Good to know your teen is always thoughtful.

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    • Thanks very much, Merlinda. He doesn’t read my blog yet as I don’t think he’s ready for it. I would like him to read it when he’s older. x

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  5. Happy Birthday to your lovely son, Sarah. Here’s to being a teenager and not being afraid to stand up to bullies. Good for him!

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    • Thanks very much. I was impressed with him standing up to the bullies (but a little bit scared for him!).

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    • Thank you! It’s not the best having your birthday on a school day, but we’re going to stretch it into Saturday so he can enjoy it a bit more.

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  6. I hope he has had a lovely day, and welcome to the world of teenagers- I haven’t found it as bad as it is painted, in fact I really like my teenager, as well as the obligatory love thing! Xx

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    • Thanks very much, that’s reassuring to know! Your daughter always sounds lovely. I remember my friend saying to her daughter: ‘I love you, but I don’t much like you right now’. That must be a tough thing to have to say and I hope I never need to say it! x

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  7. Belated happy birthday to your son Sarah. Fab pics, you look so young! Bet thirteen years have gone in the blink of an eye. I can’t believe my eldest will be five in a few weeks, but know the next five years will disappear just as fast #PoCoLo

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    • Thanks very much, 13 years have gone pretty quickly! I was young then – 28! The next five years will fly and then he’ll be an adult. Eeek! I need to enjoy him while I still can.

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  8. Happy birthday to your boy! I hope he had a fab day!
    He sounds like a wonderful young man.

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  9. Happy birthday to your big boy, he sounds pretty perfect to me and very like any one of my boys, the bit about finding the info on the exams after they have happened is so very typical of boys. #MagicMoments

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  10. I think it is quite a milestone to become the parent of a teenager! It sounds like he has such varied interests and that you have brought him up to be one fabulous young man. Happy Birthday to him and I hope you all had a wonderful day together. Thank you for linking to PoCoLo 🙂 x

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  11. massive massive belated birthday to your son Sarah! .. its scary having a 13 year old its like they have stepped into another universe! x

    thanks for linking up with #Magicmoments

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  12. He sounds an absolutely adorable boy (with adorable photos to match) and a typical teen. Daughter3 will be 13 in August and is already demonstrating the worst aspects of teenagerhood *sigh* and also fights with her brother on a daily basis (he’s five years younger). I hope your boy had a fab birthday and he enjoys his new adventures as a fully fledged teenager x

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