Scruffy teenage boy

Christmas is on its way and we are once again stumped about what to buy for our teenage boys. They never know what they want and we never know what to get for them. I’ve tried looking at the gift type websites, but my sons just don’t like things like that.

My husband has concluded he needs to buy some clothes for my eldest. He thinks he’s too scruffy. But isn’t that a teenage boy’s right? When else in life do we get to be scruffy? And how can someone in their mid-40s know what’s ‘too scruffy’ for a 16 year old?

My son has his own style. Well, I’m not sure if it’s even a style. He has some clothes he likes that may or may not go together. But, again, who is to say if they go together or not?

He never wears jeans, only grey or navy chinos. I’ll admit it, they do look scruffy. They fade very quickly and always look like they could do with an iron. But they’re his choice.

Like the rest of the family, he wears a fair few Superdry Tshirts and hoodies. He’s a dedicated Explorer who likes hiking, so has a few hiking and camping clothes, as well as brands like North Face. I’m not entirely sure whether the hiking and camping clothes should be worn when he’s not hiking or camping, but that’s his decision, not mine.

He has a pair of smartish Clarks shoes he chose for himself. They’re suede and a colour somewhere between beige and grey. I like them, my son loves them, my husband hates them.

Technically, they don’t go with North Face hoodies. They ‘should’ be worn with shirts. He does have one shirt that he wears for ‘best’, but most of the time he’s just in hoodies and sweatshirts. And sometimes he has his shoes on with them.

My husband says he ‘can’t’ wear the shoes with the hoodies.

I have pointed out to my son that they don’t really go together. But I’ve said it once and I’m leaving it at that. If he didn’t realise they didn’t match and he was bothered about it, he would stop wearing the shoes with hoodies. But clearly he’s not bothered, so it’s his choice to wear them together.

I don’t know if his friends look at him and wonder why he’s wearing those shoes with hoodies or whether they think there’s nothing wrong with it.

He might not look the most stylish, but I don’t want to turn him into a 35 year old man, because he’s not a 35 year old man. He’s a 16 year old boy, who is wearing what he wants to wear. And maybe in the world of 16 year old boys, he is stylish. Who knows? I certainly don’t, because I’m not a 16 year old boy and nor is my husband.

Who cares if his clothes don’t quite match?

And in the meantime, we still haven’t decided what to get him for Christmas.

Shoes, Son, Smart shoes, Teenager, Scruffy teenage boy

 

 

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Author: Sarah Mummy

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22 Comments

  1. Yep! I have teenage twin lads. I adopted them at seven. When they moved in they wore the same clothes. Ever since they moved in, they have chosen what to wear. Sometimes they look sooo scruffy, but then when it matters they scrub up well. It doesn’t harm anyone what they wear, and their peers will tell them too!

    Still needs ideas for Christmas too! Any help?!

    Post a Reply
    • It’s good to read that you don’t worry about what they wear either. My boy can scrub up well too on occasions. My boy has asked for Doc Marten’s and it looks like there will be another hoodie too, as well as a couple of phone chargers because he’s always losing/ breaking his, then nicking everyone else’s!

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  2. I have to say I like them but I am no expert on teen fashion let alone teen boys fashion! I have many friends who have teen boys and tell me how much easier it is to buy for girls. They may be right! This year the girls have essentially chosen their own. Good luck!

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    • Thanks very much. It’s definitely easier to buy for girls! Although mine isn’t a teenager yet, so I guess that could change. The shoes are very nice and look quite smart, but the jury is still out over whether they go with a hoodie!

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  3. Get him an ASOS voucher and let him make up his own mind! You should have seen how I dressed at his age.Thankfully I wasn’t that into photos as a teenage so no pics remain. trust me, you have a very stylish kid!

    Post a Reply
    • Ha ha, thanks very much! I was always quite experimental with my clothing as a teenager (and well into my 20s!), which is why I don’t worry about how he looks myself. I hadn’t even thought of ASOS! I only ever think of actual, physical high street shops.

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  4. I say good for him wearing what he is comfortable with. I think fashion is rubbish so no wonder you and he struggle to get him matching stuff he likes. Yeh I am struggling – mine wants me to find him more books! We have also (shh) got him a Garmin as he really is enjoying his running. My oldest has warm clothes ready for his trip to Iceland for Christmas. Good luck.

    Post a Reply
    • I would love to buy books for my boys, sadly they have both gone off reading in recent years. I was going to buy my husband a Garmin (or similar), but then he changed his mind and decided he was happy enough using an app on his phone. Boys don’t get any easier to buy for when they turn 40!

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  5. Good on him for choosing his own style and going with it….
    I would have no idea what’s fashionable for a teenage boy….
    My nephew always looks scruffy in hoodies, tracksuit bottoms and trainers….You boy sound quite stylish compared to my nephew. lol

    Post a Reply
    • That makes me feel better – at least my boy doesn’t wear tracksuit bottoms! I’m not sure I have much idea what’s fashionable for a teenage boy either.

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  6. Haha, love the last line! I think when I got my brother something at that age I went for clothes, but either found out what he liked or bought vouchers. Harder for you to find out what clothes he likes without him realising it’s about his Christmas present! I totally agree with you, it has to be up to him what he wears, he’s at an age where he’s developing his own style. I’m still scruffy now and I’m in my late 30’s. Never did grow out of it.
    Nat.x

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    • I didn’t grow out of being scruffy either! I think that’s why I have more sympathy with my son’s ‘look’ than my husband does. Generally boys don’t want clothes for Christmas/ birthdays, but it’s hard to know what else to buy for them! x

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  7. I totally hear you on this one. BP, 13, has a similar kind of “style” – he doesn’t really care what goes with what or how he looks, he just wants to stand out somehow. We’ve spent a fair few £££ in Superdry this year, some purchases were for Christmas and others, like 2 new coats, were just because he needed them. Have you tried Fat Face? There’s some great sweaters and t-shirts that we’ve bought for BP that might work with your son’s style?
    You’re right about not being 16 though, it’s so hard to know what is stylish these days I’ve given up on trying to tell BP what he should and shouldn’t wear. He makes his choices and for the most part they’re not too bad.
    Morgan x

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    • That’s interesting that your son wants to stand out. That’s what I was like as a teenager. I don’t think my son wants to stand out, but he doesn’t want to conform with certain styles, which I think is the same as most teenagers. Fat Face is a good tip. We’ve wandered in there a couple of times, but not bought bought anything.

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  8. I love your attitude here. Because I do like fashion, I do get a bit irritated when my kids where their horrible old scruffy clothes (that don’t go together) when they have a wardrobe full of really nice clothes that do! I would probably err on the side of your husband but actually I think you’re right – if he doesn’t care, why sweat it? My son had non-uniform day at school today. He wore jeans, a Nike zip up top and his school shoes! He forgot to put trainers on! I offered to take them in for him and for the first time ever, he actually cared enough to say yes!

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    • I guess this has always been my attitude to my own clothes, so I probably understand my son better than my husband does. (He also moans about my daughter wearing leggings and hoodies when she has nice clothes in her wardrobe!) Bless your son and his school shoes! My younger son would never make such a mistake. He only has one pair of trainers and will wear them if they’re soaking wet or covered in mud, but if my eldest accidentally went out in his school shoes it wouldn’t bother him at all!

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  9. My boys are very particular when it comes to close even now. My 8yo has to pick his own stuff and has had my ripping his jeans and tie-dying. They both love track suits and sonetti stuff. I’d give vouchers for clothes now. x

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    • It’s amazing how some boys are so into clothes and hair at such a young age. My boys do know what they don’t like, but don’t always know what they do like! Tracksuits are a complete no-no here! My problem with vouchers is I don’t even know what shops/ brands they really like! x

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  10. I have a mixture of ages of boys and girls and let me tell you it never gets easier lol.

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    • Oh dear! Why does that not surprise me?!

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  11. Even having a teenage son too, I wouldn’t have a clue what is fashionable. Morgan just wears whatever he feels comfortable in too, and I have literally just had a conversation with husband as he really needs a new pair of trainers. I have to force him to buy new clothes and shoes lol x

    Post a Reply
    • Glad it’s not just my boy! I think there are plenty of boys like ours who just want to feel comfortable and I think there’s nothing wrong with that at all!

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