Nearly two years ago, I started this blog. When I got up in the morning, I had no idea I was going to start a blog. If I hadn’t started it then, would I ever have started it? Would I ever have discovered how much I enjoy writing, met so many amazing people both online and in real life and realised that people actually quite like reading what I write? I’m not sure that I would. Yet it’s almost impossible for me to imagine a life without blogging now.
In life there are so many of these sliding doors moments – decisions taken on a whim or due to some outside influence that change just a little bit of your life.
I am now in my fourth summer of wearing purple Crocs flip flops pretty much every day (I’m on my second pair and have also recently invested in a black pair, which are ever so slightly more suitable for work). Did I consciously choose to buy purple Crocs flip flops? No, I bought them because I’d lost a suitcase full of shoes in Italy and Italian women have really tiny feet and I was desperately in need of shoes that fit. When I put my feet in them after a stressful hour or more trying to buy shoes, they felt like the best thing ever. They still do.
When my daughter started school, my husband signed me up for a half marathon. He didn’t really ask me, he just did it. Since then, I’ve been running two half marathons a year – one in spring and one in autumn. In between times, I run anyway, as I have done all of my adult life. But for nearly half the year I am running very long distances – eight miles or more – twice a week to train for a half marathon. Running is a big part of my life and I love it, but if my husband hadn’t signed me up for that first half marathon, would I be running half marathons twice a year now? I really don’t know.
Then there are the really big things. The things that shaped my family…
If I’d have been in the right catchment area, I’d have gone to grammar school and I wouldn’t have ended up doing my second-rate course at my second-rate university and I wouldn’t have met my husband and I wouldn’t have had my kids. Some kids, maybe. But not THOSE kids. Not my kids.
If I’d opted for more academic A Levels I wouldn’t have ended up doing my second-rate course at my second-rate university and I wouldn’t have met my husband and I wouldn’t have had my kids. Some kids, maybe. But not THOSE kids. Not my kids.
If my A Level predictions had matched my A Level grades I wouldn’t have ended up doing my second-rate course at my – you get the picture…
So my course was crap, my university was crap and the job I got at the end of it (and still have) isn’t all I would have hoped for. But maybe everything happens for a reason? Maybe I was supposed to go to that crappy university so that I could meet my husband and have my kids – the exact amazing and annoying three kids I have.
When I think about it like that, everything happens for a reason. Apart from losing shoes. There can never be a reason for that.