Almighty row

It was nearly time for rugby and the boys weren’t ready. They’ve been going to sleep later and later. The previous night I found my younger son still awake at 11.15. And not for the first time.

I was getting ready myself when I heard what can only be described as a blood-curdling scream. It went on and on and on. There was a brief pause for breath and it started again. Screaming, screaming and screaming. I’d never heard anything like it. I didn’t know who it was, all I knew was that I was terrified and I had to get upstairs fast.

It’s no exaggeration to say I was expecting a broken limb or vast quantities of blood.

What I found was my younger son standing at the top of the stairs in his new onesie (which he loves, he’s very particular about onesies, especially new ones) covered in what at first appeared to be vomit.

‘He spat on me! He spat on me!’ he sobbed and screamed.

It was toothpaste. Spat at him by his brother.

Horrible, but probably not worthy of the scream which had left my husband and I literally shaking.

My husband told him off for screaming, I peeled the dirty onesie off him and he ran off in floods of tears and slammed his door. My husband snatched the toothbrush off my eldest and chucked it (it broke).

My eldest was angry, but defiant. He felt he’d done nothing wrong (despite the fact we’d all seen the evidence of his wrong-doing with our own eyes). There were no tears from him.
Slowly we pieced together what had happened, but I suspect we don’t have the full story. It was a classic case of six of one and half a dozen of the other, but, as ever, much of the blame seemed to lie with my eldest.
Working back from the spitting incident, my younger son had allegedly punched his brother. He’d hit him for calling him gay (how many times do I have to tell them that calling someone gay is not funny and shouldn’t be used as an insult?). My eldest had apparently called his brother gay because my younger son had teased him about his spots.
And that was it. The scariest scream in history was because of that.
Yes, it’s pathetic.
Please tell me we’re not the only family who has to deal with this sort of nonsense?
If anyone ever wonders why I don’t name my kids or share recognisable photos of them, this is why. Because their behaviour was embarrassing and they would be embarrassed if their friends read this. But I will never shy away from sharing these stories about my kids and being totally honest about the highs and lows of parenting teens, tweens and siblings.

Author: Sarah Mummy

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  1. Your house always reminds me of mine growing up as we are one girl and two boys. (Although I’m the eldest). This kind of thing went on till we hit 18ish and went off to uni. Then we all came back 3 years later. Hopefully the never ending screaming may have been a one off. Good luck xx it’s definitely a phase…I think.

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    • Thanks very much! We used to fight as kids too, but it was mainly me and my brother who fought as my sister is so much younger. I hope it does pass! x

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  2. We also get the blood curdling screams over nothing, Gay is also used as an insult especially by our seven year old, he doesn’t like something so it’s gay!
    I don’t use my kids real names on my blog, I use their middle names so as not to embarrass them!

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    • Thanks very much, that’s reassuring to know we’re not the only ones.
      Great idea to use the middle names on the blog – sometimes I find it a bit clunky to say ‘my younger son’ etc.

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  3. You are not alone. I ended up with my 4 boys saying ‘is anyone hurt’ if the answer was no, I walked away and left them to their screaming. Unfortunately this escalated on more than one occasion where one child called the police and said I’d hit them as they’d felt I was being unfair and another time we ended up replacing a £300 stained glass window after they started fighting over who’s turn it was to clear the table. They were 21 & 17 at that time.

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    • Oh my goodness, that’s quite scary! You really would like to think they would have grown out of it by that age. There are times when I do ignore my boys, but I really thought this one was serious. I won’t run so fast next time!

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  4. Oh so familiar! I often get yelled at because someone has hit someone or some nonsense, then discover that the person who got hit did something equally vile to incite the hitting. And my eldest is 18…..honestly, siblings are hideous at times, luckily they balance it by being very loving at other times! I know me and my brother weren’t any different!

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    • Me and my brother weren’t either! You would think that with such a big age gap yours would be less likely to fight! I know my younger son shouts loudest and is generally not the cause of the trouble, so he always tries to put his case first, but it often turns out he’s been just as bad as his brother once we start to unravel the situation.

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  5. My youngest is a terror for those blood curdling screams…I always shout are you hurt if she answers I know she’s ok….lol Kids!!

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    • Good thinking! We’d never heard a scream like that one, so really thought it was something serious. I won’t run so fast next time!

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  6. Of course you’re not! As you can imagine, all 3 of mine are much the same and is in this incident, the scream is always totally irrational. My girls argue over the most ridiculous things and usually first thing in the morning or last thing at night (tiredness) – the last thing for them to argue over was a skirt and yes, it often involves toothpaste being spat at one another! Goodness, I hope we can laugh at these things one done. Keep on being honest, it helps the rest of us no end 🙂

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    • Thanks! I didn’t think we were the only ones to put up with these fights, but am pleasantly surprised to discover that spat toothpaste isn’t an uncommon phenomenon either!

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  7. I think that anyone who’s a parent can identify with this kind of bad behaviour from their kids at some time. It’s infuriating, frustrating and makes us cross, but it’s a phase that we just have to get though.
    Stay sane hun and keep blogging, it’ll help to rationalise how you feel x

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    • Thanks very much, Izzie, that’s reassuring to know! I will keep on blogging and will never sanitise my life – I’m sharing the good, the bad, the ugly and the spat toothpaste! x

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  8. Wow you must have been terrified hearing a scream like that! Can totally imagine dropping everything to run upstairs! Only for it to be something so daft? Kids, honestly! Xx #weekendbloghop

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  9. Oh no you are not alone. My two boys are best of friends worst of enemies and the enemy bit gets very wearing at times. The gay thing is a tricky one isn’t it? Mine think it is funny to use the word and it doesn’t matter how many times I say not to, they still do. Boys eh?

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  10. No Sarah you are not alone, my kids can fall out over one walking by the other and them giving the other a dirty look. I have run upstairs many a time with the shouting that sounds so bad!! ha yes boys eh? I have 3 boy 😉

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  11. Had to smile at this, sounds all too familiar! Why is it the pettiest things cause the biggest noise!? Keep sharing these moments as it makes us all going through similar experiences feel much better, knowing we’re not alone. X

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