To make me laugh

Because it hasn’t been the best week, a selection from the kids for no reason other than that they make me laugh.

B1 age 10 1/4: If you could have a field for free, what would you do with it?

B1 age 10 1/4: Daddy, would you say USA is a chavvy country?

LG age 5 1/2: Are there actually toilets at your work? Are you allowed to stop work to go to the toilet?

LG age 5 1/2: Does Google know my foot?

LG age 5 1/4: Has Grandma lived in that house forever?
Me: She’s lived there 30 years.
LG: Wow, that is a long time. Is that longer than B2 knocked his teeth out?

LG age 5 1/4: Is there such a thing as black ham because you sometimes have black pigs?

LG age 5 1/4: What sort of a bus is a coach?

LG age 5 1/4: Is that a real dinosaur?

LG age 5 1/4: If you sucked your fingers with this on (nail varnish), would you still die?
Me: No.
LG: I thought so, because I sucked my fingers and my heart was still beeping.