Letting it go

As things to wake up at 4.30 worrying about go, it was pretty lame. But I couldn’t get it out of my head and it was still bugging me when I was up and properly awake. My daughter has her Grade 2 Modern exam coming up and I’d promised her teacher faithfully she would practise at home. But the only thing we have to play a CD on is my husband’s computer.

I use a Macbook Air (which you can’t put a CD in), my desktop computer’s speakers are missing and my younger son’s laptop has stopped working. My husband tells me I could play it in the DVD player, but to make the DVD player work, we need to unplug the Virgin box. If you think I know how to unplug a Virgin box and plug a DVD player in, you don’t know me well enough. I’m rubbish at anything like that. There are two people in this house who can perform this tricky manoeuvre – my husband and my younger son. But are they ever around and listening to us and willing to help when my daughter needs to practise dance? If you think they are, you are obviously luckier with the menfolk in your house than I am.

Which brings me back to my husband’s work computer. It is usually at work with my husband. When it’s at home, my husband is still working on it. On the rare occasions when he isn’t working on it, he (understandably) doesn’t want anyone touching it.

Which leaves me with the dilemma that woke my up at 4.30am. I’m juggling so many balls right now and I spend my life worrying that I’m going to forget something. I’m trying to stay in control of it all, but sometimes it feels like it’s slipping through my fingers.

Then someone tweeted me and told me they’d got their kids a cheap CD player from Argos. And I remembered a recent conversation with a friend who told me how you could spend your Nectar points at Argos. Result! So I got a CD player. I didn’t even spend any actual money on it.

CD player, Daughter, Dance

That’s one weight off my mind.

Just another couple of hundred to go. Would we make it to the dance classes on time after choir? How would I pick my son up from rugby when I’m in a different part of town with my daughter? Would I find the right part of the hospital for my son’s appointment? Would I remember to write the letter about my daughter’s cross country?

My daughter is now doing extra revision dance lessons on a Wednesday, ready for her modern exam. Which means missing another dance lesson, but she could still get to her next lesson. So that’s choir to dance lesson, brief bit of down time and than another dance lesson. It’s too much. For her and for me.

We’d been pondering dropping one of the Wednesday classes, at least until after Christmas and the panto. But my daughter felt too tired for the other one too.

Suddenly everything made sense. We were seeing clearly. We can’t do it. I can’t juggle three kids and dance lessons and rugby. My daughter can’t go from choir to dance lesson to dance lesson. We need to relax, we need to eat. She needs to do her homework and watch TV. She needs to go to bed at a decent hour.

So she didn’t go to her dance class. She’s not going again until after Christmas. She’s focusing on her modern exam and then on the panto. We can’t do any more. We’re letting it all go.

I made tea for the three kids together. The four of us sat down to eat together. I realised this never happens in the week. I felt happier and lighter. We had to let something go. We had to get our priorities right. We’d made the right decision.

Author: Sarah Mummy

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21 Comments

  1. You are busier than me and that’s saying something! I’m glad you made the decision early and haven’t spent far too many weeks running around like a headless chicken. Good luck to the tiny dancer in her modern exams xx

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    • Thanks very much, I’m sure she will smash it! I’m so glad we dropped the dance classes for now, although it will all change again when panto rehearsals start!

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  2. That’s a heck of a lot of juggling and it sounds like the best decision to let something go for now, especially if it’s made you feel a whole lot better afterwards. Well done on your Freebie though 🙂

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    • Thanks very much 🙂 I feel so much better for it! So glad I managed to get the CD player for free – hubby wouldn’t be happy about me spending money on some 1990s technology!

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  3. Excellent decision. There’s just no point in running the whole family ragged and finding no one is actually enjoying themselves. Glad you got there in the end and hope you manage to relax together a bit more. x

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    • Thanks very much, here’s hoping! It’s mainly me that is run ragged, but it was getting too much for my daughter too. I definitely made the right decision.

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  4. I hate that ‘slipping through your fingers’ feeling – I’m there at the moment, too. Everything has to be written down! Sounds like the right decision, nice to have a little time off and you can’t beat all sitting down together as a family x

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    • It’s awful, isn’t it? I write stuff down and still either forget it or wake up early in the morning worrying! Definitely good to take a bit of a break and a bonus to actually sit down and eat together for once! x

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  5. It’s hard to gain a balance with kid’s clubs and family life too.It’s important for them to have outside school activities but if it’s making every miserable it needs to be addressed.

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    • Definitely! I think the main person it was making miserable was me. I needed to realise that my daughter didn’t need that many dance lessons – and she needed some times to relax and do her homework. Thanks.

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  6. Yes it really sounds like it is the right decisions. I hate that feeling when it all gets too busy. Well done, Mich x

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    • It’s a really horrible feeling and I feel so much more relaxed now from just taking that bit of pressure off. Thanks.

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  7. I spend my life worrying at the moment and trying to juggle. I made the decision that I could only cope with 2 classes each for mine after school this year and it is hard but I am glad we didn’t do more. The boys don’t really mind – it is just me that feels guilty. Glad you have come to a good decision that suits you x

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    • It’s a horrible feeling! Very sensible to only have two activities each. That’s what my eldest does. It’s my daughter who is the problem! She was fine about dropping a couple of dance classes, thank goodness. x

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  8. I find it really hard to get a happy balance too! We rarely manage to all sit down together during the week either so I always feel happy when we manage it.

    Good luck with the exams x

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    • Thanks very much! Glad we’re not the only ones who don’t sit down together. Sometimes I end up with three or four sittings in the week! 🙁

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  9. Sounds like it was a good decision to make for all of you. It’s sods law it all happens on the same day.

    Apart from Saturdays when I went from a morning at music school, then on to dancing in the after when I was secondary school, until 6th form it was all pretty manageable. It all seems normal when you’re doing it all, but then you step back or someone mentions how nuts it seems, and then you get to think about the priorities. Hard decisions to make when they love it so much.

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    • Thanks very much, definitely a good decision! Sometimes it is hard to step back from it all and see the wood from the trees, but I’m glad I have.

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  10. If you’re waking up thinking about all this, then letting something go seems like the best way forward. Just think – the tortoise got to where he was travelling before the speedy hare, because he took a steady path….

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    • Most definitely! It’s such a relief. Thanks very much.

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  11. I totally agree and we have stopped swimming with R for a while for the same reason, there are simply not enough hours in the day. It drives me insane, constantly rushing from one thing to the next. The thing is, having a bit of quality family time is also important and it does give you all a bit of a break too

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