Little visitors
Mar23

Little visitors

My eldest has little visitors in his hair. This is not good news. It signals an exhausting and depressing weekend ahead. I know because we’ve been here many times before. I lived 35 blissful years of my life without coming into contact with a nit. We had a nit nurse at school and everyone got their heads checked. To my knowledge, nothing was ever found. Well, not on me, my friends or my brother at any rate. We sailed through the...

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Little lady
Mar22

Little lady

When my daughter was 4, I looked at her, standing patiently at the bottom of soft-play with one brother behind her to shove her and one in front to pull her, and I saw her future. My girl is, and always has been, very physically able. She was perfectly capable of climbing that thing. But my girl was destined to be a kept woman. Without her brothers, she was nothing. With both boys at school, she was half a person. She could never...

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Alarm clock
Mar21

Alarm clock

This is something that’s been bugging me for a while now. It’s one of those Mars/ Venus situations I don’t see being resolved until we are retired and the kids have all flown the nest. I get up early, leaving myself lots of time to get the kids and myself ready. On work days I get up at 6. When the kids are at school, but I’m not at work I get up at 6.20. And on magical days when I’m not at work, but the...

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TV talent
Mar19

TV talent

My girl likes nothing better than a good TV talent show. Or even a bad TV talent show. As a family we watch XFactor and Britain’s Got Talent. It’s not exactly a relaxing experience. The kids get over-excited and dance in front of the TV or start singing, drowning out the superior vocal efforts of the contestants. There’s a lot of shouting – a lot of ‘Sit down!’ ‘Move out of the way!’...

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Crime, law and order
Mar18

Crime, law and order

Crime is something which doesn’t happen to us. It is committed by other people to other people. That makes it endlessly fascinating, scary and mysterious to my kids… LG age 4 1/2: Will any of us ever go to prison? LG age 4 3/4: What are robbers? Are they people? Can they fly? B1 age 9 1/2: If you were a robber, and you were robbing a school, why wouldn’t you steal all the small things like footballs? B1 age 9 1/2:...

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